Posts tagged ‘social network’
Inspired by Last Week’s and This Week’s Events Curious of the Male Perspective.
Posted by Elle, a guy’s best friend on November 1, 2008 at 9:04pm
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Last week, I was randomly introduced to a guy at the cafeteria at my friend’s university. The guy seemed pretty decent with an ambitious future. We talked for a good 30 minutes about Los Angeles, the city we were studying in, and of course, politics. He asked for my number, but never called me. I don’t flip if a guy doesn’t call me, but I do find it weird when a guy does ask for my number and doesn’t call me anyway. His name was Michael, political science major, and future corporate litigator. What surprised me was that this Michael is the same one that my female friend currently is interested in. I have no interest in the guy, but after finding out the guy I met and the one she is interested in is one of the same, I freaked me out. I never want to take a girl’s guy. In my friend’s best interest, I would stay away from a guy. For myself, I feel if my friend saw him first, she should have him or if she really likes him, she can have him. There are more guys out there. I never want to be known as the “girl who took my man.”
My friend told me that she had been pursuing this guy for a number of weeks. She met him at a club night in downtown with her girlfriends. She danced with him the remainder of the night, exchanged numbers, and went along their ways. However, my female friend started going to his college to go visit him. But he was always busy? She would text, but would not get an answer until later into the day. She would call, but no response. I thought so myself, why is that? If a girl comes down to see you from her university, shouldn’t you be happy? This is where I become puzzled. He asked for her number, they exchanged, and he says he’s “busy?” What’s wrong with this picture?
I started to feel really bad for my female friend. I’d be ecstatic if I was the guy. I felt like she was wasting her time with this Michael just because he didn’t want to make time with her. In addition, if he wasn’t interested, shouldn’t he just say so?
I understand school is always number one for a student’s priorities, but shouldn’t this guy say something? Respond back? Either establish that he is or is not interested?
So help me understand something. Don’t be shy.
Shouldn’t every guy exercise some proper ettiquette with a girl? Is this guy a player or one of those guys who is just indecisive? Someone let me know and offer me some perspective. Thank you
My Most Recent Breakup
On Thursday night, I admitted to my beau that I was not doing well and my ill state made me think about our relationship. I became confused about our relationship because it was going to a direction I wanted. My beau and I have different values about life. He wants to get married when he’s 25 and I probably don’t want to get married/ if I do get married, I would have to be 30. We have different lifestyles – he is very simple and I am complicated because I do not know how to be simple. I never felt so loved by someone in my entire life. He was my first kiss, the first guy who made me feel like a girl instead of a guy, and the first guy that made me do backflips.
I think down the line he and I were better off as friends. On Thursday night, i poured out my feelings telling him that ” I am confused about where we are” and that maybe he should “start seeing other girls since I can not offer him what he wants and I don’t deserve someone like him.” In addition, I felt that I was holding him back a lot by not giving him what he wanted.
Last night, we went out to dinner and talked about what was going to happen. He understood that I still need to do some soul searching. He came over and we cuddled on the couch thinking about our relationship. Just as he was going to leave, we had one last beautiful kiss. I cried because he meant so much to me and will always mean so much. He told me, ” Don’t ever cry over a guy.” He wiped my tears away and kissed me one last time. I watched him leave and prayed that everything will be okay for him and that he receives the most happiness in his ture.
I watched him depart and I went to my room to cry. I hope he and I will remain friends. I always manage to stay friends with my exes so I hope this won’t be difficult. I don’t know when I will start dating again, but because there are many unanswered questions in my mind it won’t be for a while.
I got an email about Ava’s ways of getting over someone. I’m going to try them since Halloween is coming up soon. A part of me wants to tell people that we are still together so I don’t have to answer any questions, but then another part of me wants to hang out with my gfs so we will have a great time.
Monster massive
so so crazy… my night still hasnt ended ; p my car is and cell phone is at whisper’s place, and he abandoned me at bobby’s place in ucla. Now im trying to figure out how to get to my car and hes not answering is phone. Really good night though i wish i had my car because i am sooo tired. bleh! I think we are going to venice. Im still wearing my nacho libre costume.
~Sean
Stylelife Challenge Day 2
Day: 2 (Oct 25th, 2008)
Challenge: talk to five strangers (any age, gender, etc) and get a response (like yesterday), but you have to make eye contact and remember their eye color and record it in the book.
Accomplished?: Yes
Thoughts: This was exactly like yesterday but with the focus on eye contact. It was pretty simple, I was all over the place on saturday so I kept meeting new people and just enjoyed myself (well except for the end of the night but thats another story). The first person I conversed with was a dude waiting in line at the tailgate tent at the college game I went to. We talked about the long wait and he had brown eyes. Next was a guy at the gym who I talked about cardio with, he had blue eyes. Then at the play I saw, I randomly yelled from across the theatre if this girl was my friend’s sister (she wasnt and I knew that lol) and she was pretty cute but was with her bf, she had blue eyes and glasses too. Next was the old guy outside of the theatre who we talked about the rain with. He had brown eyes. And finally I went to the after “party” with the cast of the play. I talked with one of the actresses about her role and she had brown eyes. All in all a fun day and pretty easy challenge. I can say already that I’m becoming more comfortable talking with strangers. Hopefully day 3 will be as fun!
Were, Who, What am I
In recent weeks I have taken it upon myself to make me better. I have started to reread “The Game” By the great Neil Strauss. When I picked it up again after about 4 months or more of not reading it. This feeling over came of being hyped and excited about the game like i was a newbie coming in to it again. Now don’t get me wrong, I am still a newbie and keep up with a-lot of forums on the subject.
My mother recently asked me, ” Jon what do you wanna do when you grow up?” in reply with out thinking about it ” I wanna work with and for Mystery, he has helped me out sooo much and the whole Venusian Arts crew don’t even realize it.” This conversion quickly turned to why i wanted to pickup women my whole life and me explaining that its not just about that…. But I digress.
This blog really has no point to it to be honest just felt like i needed to get something off my mind and thought that Tara’s spot would be the best place for it.
Field Report Female Edition Part 7
I call my friend to tell her I’m done and heading to pick her up. She tells me some stuff and long story short, I’m no longer going out with her and I’m free.
Now, Coke Bottle glasses from date one of my experiment has been texting me all day as he’s done the impossible and won two trifectas in the beginners cup. So he wanted me to go out and celebrate with him.
So I went. He met me…. drunk. And then we went to grab subs and head to his brothers house to park my car. He’s ragging on my beetle… and boys… I LIKE My car. It’s an accurate representation of me… bubbly and FUN!
And I do not take well to repeated stuff about how crappy my car is…
So then I park at his brothers and we go inside and I meet his brother and I get a beer and I learn his brothers wife is on business in WA, and then coke bottle decides to show me the pictures where he looks “so hot”. And he gets down his brothers wedding album and proceeds to show me all his family, friends, etc. and I comment:
“Because showing me wedding pictures on our third meeting isn’t weird at all”
I think his brother knew he was starting out bad… but he had no idea how much worse it could get.
I then listened to him and his brother jabber on and on about something… very boring, sport inspired and completely non-including me.
He kept looking into my eyes and the more he did the more I realized I was SO unattracted to him.
He was clingy
He kept making fun of my shirt (Granted Every time he’s seen me I’ve been coming from work in the same fitted black babydoll t-shirt & work logo with some form of blazer) but I TOLD him I’m a workoholic and He’s lucky to be seeing me at all!
So we move on to a bar, and we sit and can’t see the sabers game from the booth we end up in, more conversation and me being soooooo freaking bored I was PRAYING for some guy to come rescue me.
Sadly, I had to make my own luck and ended up going to the bathroom to escape. I called the first PUA in my phone for some mental stimulation, but the signal from the bathroom was godawful. So I kept losing the signal and so I started talking to the girls in the bathroom.
“You ever been on a date that was SO bad you just had to escape for a minute?”
A surprising thing then happened that I’ve never experienced.
This women SNAPPED into action. Within a minute they had a plan of action, and I was returning to my table to only moments later be stolen by these girls to have a drink at the bar with some long lost friends…
Then once at the bar with them in another room their group openly adopted me and other cuter (but not by much) guys were like… what the hell are you DOING with that guy!?
Being the nice girl that I am I could not bring myself to ditch coke bottle and his brother…. I just couldn’t.
So the group moved on to another bar, and I was determined to stick it out to the end of the sabers game.
I want to shoot myself. I’m forced to be nice to this guy…
I’m thinking get to the end of the game,… then leave before I turned “into a pumpkin”
The sabres go into overtime.
FU*K.
I can’t take it anymore.
And all the while he’s been calling me by the name of my town, rather than by my name… and pissing me off. I told him not to before…. not joking…
So he calls me by my towns name and I say “You call me that one more time and I’m leaving.”
He does it just to call my bluff.
That was all I needed.
Within seconds, I was GONE out of the bar, practically RUNNING back to my car at his brothers house desperate to get out of there.
More details to come tmw…
Tired… needing sleep.
Never had to run out on a date before.
Jeebus.
~Fun
Stylelife Challenge Day 1
I recently purchased Neil Strauss’ sequel to “The Game” called the “Stylelife Challenge”. For anyone unfamiliar with the sequel, it’s basically a how to book for pick up, but in two volumes. One is the 30 day, master your game challenge and the second, the PUA companion, tells more adventures of Style. The challenge starts slow having you start off by just conversing with strangers and progresses to grooming, pick up, and all other aspects of game culminating into a “casted” party on the 30th day.
I’ve been trying to better my game for a little over a year now, but seem to still be not that far off from an AFC. I know all the technical aspects of game, but haven’t implemented it on a continuous basis. Just to say a little on myself so you guys know where I’m coming from, I’m a junior in HS (I know a lot on the younger side, lol) and have been shy for most of my life. When I found out about the show the PUA on an iTunes free preview the summer of ’07, it gave me the answers I always wanted. I read “The Game” and other materials and watched the show and I put it in play immediately. However I got too much success too early. This one chick i was really into (doesn’t it always start off that way, lol) I was able to “pick up” and we went out to the movies (so AFC) and made out (first kiss too for me) and I was on top of the world. My goal from the start was to get into a relationship and we were so connected that I thought I completed my goal. However the week after she told me she was seeing another guy and I tried to be cool. Then I did something stupid: I used an opener from the show (the cheating one) over IM (I’m an idiot) and she called me out and I tried to come up w/ a bullshit story and came across as a creeper. To say the least I was obsessed with her, and instead of learning from this experience, I got depressed over my “failure” and didn’t game much after. I mean I had like a handful of approaches and a few good pick ups but that’s it, I didn’t turn into a suave guy and only a little less shy. Now I realized, “WTF AM I DOING !?!?!?” I mean its been a year since her and I’m still thinking about her. I really feel now that I have moved on and I want to get my game to where it should be, which is why I bought the book.
So know to the good stuff: I hope to be posting everyday about each challenge of the game and whether I have accomplished it or not.
Day: 1 (Oct 24th, 2008)
Challenge: talk to five strangers (any age, gender, etc) and get a response (even a grunt will suffice says Strauss, lol)
Accomplished?: Yes
Thoughts: I wanted to keep this PUA oriented and made it my goal to talk to five girls. I was at a football game (my school lost 
badly) and I talked to 3 girls behind me (was a bad wing though cuz I basically ripped my friend over his bohemian tranny hat, lol). Later I was at the train station and talked to 2 really hot girls about waiting for the train and the game. I realized that one of the train girls was into me and tried to keep the convo flowing, but (ik no excuses but w/e lol) I was tired as hell from walking from school to the station and I was hungry and shook up after the confrontation I had with this kid at the game. This was an easy challenge and fun too.
Wes out in the field with Sunshine
My sisters PUA name is Sunshine now, and she has not finished reading “The Game” just yet, so anything she might know about the cold approach, she knows from me. I got dressed up and went to her place before we headed to the club. She was in a low self esteem mode, and I was trying to help her find the right clothes and accessories, but she was not willing to step out of her own comfort zone with one of the peacock items I had suggested for her (she has this awesome golden Egyptian broach, and I knew right where she could have worn it). Its cool, she is still new at all this, and she will need her time to get into it. I show her a few videos I managed to find on Neil Strauss, Lovedrop, and of course Mystery. She has a crush on Matador I think, which is cool, that guy does look frigging awesome. I severely doubt he had to do much to change his luck with women, but I am not one to judge. Either way, we go out and head to the club….
We meet up with my good friend Patrick there, and enter. Me, I put on my smile as we walk into the main room and see…. no one. Lord, the only people here at the moment were the workers… and two people trying to make advertisement for a new kind of cigarette, one of which approaches us right away with a sleazy smile, low energy, nervous, and in his approach, completely obnoxious. Now I know how most groups must feel when they are approached by beginner PUAs in the field who are still learning the art of the Pickup. We turn him down, telling him we don’t smoke, and he leaves. We go and sit down, and this guy follows us again. So this guy approaches us AGAIN, only to tell us that we sat in the smoking section, thinking we must obviously be smokers. So we get him to leave, again, trying to be polite. This time, as he leaves, I turn to my sister and tell her “Did you just see that? That was how you DON’T approach people!”. She agrees, and we start chatting with my good friend Patrick. We decide to remain in this section until someone lights up a smoke, which don’t take long, so we end up relocating to a couch. This place is dead…. very little guests showing up right now. My energy level feels low, because the only sets I see, are sets that seem unapproachable. I decide that I have to acclimate myself to the environment first, since I did not know this club yet. At first, I start to droop abit, just lying back as my pivot speaks with my buddy. They are chatting it up, and me… I am taking things too seriously. I keep scanning each set that walks in, thinking “shit this might be my only chance!”. Finally, Sunshine does what a good wingman should do. She nudges me, and reminds me to smile. This actually DOES get me to smile again as I relax abit and grab a drink. I ask her opinion on which group would be the easiest to approach, but I never end up approaching the group she suggests… foreign territories, approach anxiety. I must pass them by a few times before I manage to only approach two sets, only getting short chit chat exchange before moving on. I manage to start asking this one guy about the club… not noticing really that he was homosexual until his jealous boyfriend blasted me out of the set by charging in, giving me a real jealous glance and saying “I am back now….”. That was when I looked between the both of them, saw that spark between them and thought “oh my fucking God, how did I get into this?!”. I smiled, and ejected myself politely… the evening was really not going so well right now…
Suddenly, a girl sits on the table next to my couch, and I smile at her, asking her if she can tell me who sang this song that is playing originally. Of course, I was speaking in German. She turns around, and tells me to please speak in English, so I do. We find out that we are both Canadian, and she is super cute. She is from Toronto, and her name is “Sam”. She works for CNN as a war correspondant, and just came from Iraq, and was at the club with her team right now, and would only be in Germany for three weeks. I suggest we should go somewhere to talk more, and she follows…. thats when I blow it. I lead her easily enough, but as we talk, I realize something…. she isn’t wearing any earrings, no rings, and I was NOT sure how to stack any DHVs at the moment. I kino abit, giving her playful pats on the arm and shoulder as we joke around… then one of the guys from her team bounces in, and I move right away to introduce myself, not to get blown out of the set. He has typical Alpha attributes too, so I need to concentrate on him and start ignoring her for now, or I may get blasted out of those waters. I try to get into the greek rings routine, but it never happens… they just don’t seem to know the difference between fingers and hands. I ask what fingers they wear rings on, they say “normally on the right”. I would love to neg them for it, but it would seem rude, so I just let it slide, and get introduced to another one of their friends before he buzzes off. When the guy starts mentioning that he wants to pick up a fat chick tonight, because he has a weakness for them, Sam walks away. She seems different suddenly, and soon goes up to get her coat, and returns to tell the guy that if he is going to pick up a girl tonight, she is going home now. So… he ends up going with her. My set ends here… sucks, but at least some experience was gleaned.
I am on the couch again, when suddenly a cute blonde girl sets a drink down on the table next to me, and stands there, drinking her own drink. I turn to look up at her, smile, and say “Hey, you really should not have. I mean I am sorry, but I don’t accept drinks from strangers”. We both have a good laugh about that, and she admits to be waiting for her three friends she just came with, who went to the bathroom. I just smile and introduce her to my pivot and my friend, telling her “There you go, your with three friends now, we just adopted you into our group!”. She laughs at that, and I think I built just abit of comfort there. I get up to talk to her abit, find out her name is “Maike”, and eventually her friends come back, one of them is her older sister “Sarah”. I don’t get blasted out of the set, because I just interject and smile, having her introduce me to them all, and find out the two friends are both named “Melany”, and find out her sisters name. We start dancing, and I just dance with all of them, while Sunshine dances with my friend.
Time progresses and my friend Patrick leaves to go home. My sister seems to want to leave shortly afterward, since her deadbeat boyfriend is going to pick her up to bring her home. Looks like Sunshine survived her first evening as a wingman, and even if she feels it was not the most successful, it was certainly a lot of fun. I go out to wait with her for the guy to bring her home, find out from her that Patrick was just amazed that I was dancing alone with four girls, and after she leaves, I am on my way back to the club, thinking “what now? Should I go back in or go home?”. I am walking by a group of students and perform another approach, I just ask over my shoulder “Hey, what time does the next streetcar drive?”. I start chatting it up with one of them, and soon I get introduced to the group, who automatically finds it awesome that I am Canadian. Only one of them seems mistrusting and distant, and I try not to let it bother me….
I am dancing in the club with my new friends Chung, Alex, Manuel, Carlo, and at least three others whose names I cannot remember. I use them to pump my own social value when I go to dance with Maike again, who looks surprised and says “your still here!”. I pull the spin compliance test with her and one of her friends, to pump her buying temperature abit. Her older sister is like a watchdog, and even tells me she is looking out for her younger sister tonight. The four try to lock me out of the set a few times, so I would just go off to dance with other girls, until they seemed to want me back. Finally her sister is distracted by a guy, really getting into him, but her two other friends seem to be looking out for her. I end up separating her abit from the group, dancing really close, and we end up grinding abit, which I am completely comfortable with. After that, maybe I missed out on something, but she goes back to her friends… time progresses and finally, my new friends are leaving, and I was getting tired. I see her bigger sister is doing a number close with the guy she had her eyes on, and I try to separate her from her friends, gesturing for her to follow me, showing that I gotta go. I walk away confidently, expecting her to follow… and am somewhat crushed when she does not. It was sad, but it was probably my fault. I was probably showing too much interest in her, probably seemed too needy, and I probably just didn’t dance like John Travolta on the dance floor. I don’t really care though, I had fun. I went home, email closed my new friends, and stumbled my way back into my bed, sometime around five a.m. in the morning. That was the end of that evening…
Game is LIFE
Game is LIFE for many guys.
Every response, every action, every social interaction and every human, man, woman and child has somehow become a image of game that you have cemented into your mind. Your life becomes dominated by GAME.
I’m at a point, or I’ve reached a point to where I really don’t like using the word “Game” anymore. The word gets tossed up so much around here that it has become so superficial. There is no depth to it anymore. You have the definition of how other PUA’s describe what Game is.
But what is Game to you?
Game to me…is a metaphor.
It is a metaphor for The Ultimate and True Manhood.
I lean more on Manhood for several reasons.
When I first started out, learning all these routines and trying all this new stuff out, I felt powerful. I felt like a kid going on a field trip in elementary. Can’t you recall that feeling? It’s exciting isn’t it.
And I felt that I could be irresistible to any woman who dared to cross my path. I’d get ANYONE. And that is very true.
But to an extent.
You have all this outer game stuff that you can use to attract any woman you want to. That’s a great thing to know about and be able to use with such mastery. But then, later down the road, I started asking myself some hard questions:
“If I got really into a girl and we hit it off, what type of excitement am I really going to be able to offer her?”
“Will she feel safe with me? Will she find my lifestyle and reality fascinating? All game aside that I used to get her, am I really congruent with that material?”
I had to start thinking about how to better myself, to feel better about myself. I needed to start in other areas of life that don’t require seduction or a woman for that matter.
That’s where I started working on myself a lot. I needed to build myself up and learn to feel better about myself, my confidence and my self esteem and handle my life accordingly. Stop running away from my problems.
After seeing how this stuff worked, I had a light bulb moment.
All seduction aside, all gaming aside and even work and rough moments in life…I took a step back and really saw the bigger picture for myself.
After learning the outer game and tweaking my inner game…learning to improve myself everyday
I realized that I was doing something that many men never did when they were my age.
I realized that I CHOSE this path, this road to become a better man. My best man if you will. Do you really understand what that means?
A better man. Not just a more attractive person, but the you that is buried deep inside you, that you have to struggle so much to bring him out. Once you unstrip all those bad things and find your best self, that’s what appears attractive. That is your ultimate
I took a path of manhood. I chose to walk a path of learning to become the man that my father is NOT, the man that my uncles are NOT, the man that some of my friends…sadly I think will never be. I hardly see any good examples of a true MAN in today’s society. And I aim to be just THAT.
Women need TRUE men to protect them and to love them, and put them in their places when they act out. And children need TRUE men to teach them, guide them and love them, so that when they grow up, they can teach their children what Daddy taught them. You understand?
So I’m saying, The Game opened up a door to something that I never thought about. I still work on my game everyday, I still practice because I am not where I want to be.
I am about to start a job tomorrow. I can have more money, buy the clothes I want, pay off bills and learn to handle my problems. And continue this road of TRUE MASCULINITY.
So I say to you, don’t forget to be human and take a step back and realize why you might be here. Or what you’re doing here.
You end up losing your girl because you don’t now HOW to cut game off!
You can still walk up to women and say “Hi”. You think you have to be alpha all the damn time and see everything as a DLV and DHV.
DHV’s and DLV’s don’t exist in the eyes of a man who is truly SOLID and GROUNDED on the inside. He will be firm when needed, but soft and gentle when the time calls for it. Nothing influences what he does, what he thinks and what he stands for.
This journey is something I decided to take for myself. I know it is a hard one, but I’m determined to be that solid man that women and men admire and never forget. That’s true VALUE. Be a man of VALUE.
I’m determined to be a great father and a great lover to the woman who will give me those children. Why not start now?
I am done
–Rucker
Life after Break-up
.. been awhile, I know I know.. been quite occupied lately keeping up with the fan page, trying to rank up to number one on “Pickyourgameup.com” (Ranked 2.. lost by 2hrs & some change..) gave up after 14+ of dedication. Well, life has seemed alil better for me. Last post I posted.. I was feeling a little run down by my recent “Break-up within a Break-up”. Since then, yes, I have seen my ex, fooled around abit and decided much space was needed and not to break that. SoO much has changed with that, that I don’t know who he is anymore and sometimes that scares me. No phone calls, simple answer txt, ignored txt.. and tell offs.. not too pleasing to the heart or soul but, am slowly letting go of that. It still hurts but, not anywhere near when it first started to. Sometimes I think for the worse.. what if he’s seeing someone..? Not cause I’m jealous anymore.. he lives his own secret life and that I’ll never know. It’s just the way he acts sometimes, its weird and almost like he’s hiding something. I hate to accuse and maybe wrong, but people should watch the signals they throw out there. As far as a job.. I realized why I wasn’t getting call backs to all these places I have applied for.. I HAD THE WRONG AREA CODE DOWN ON MY RESUME!! loll.. thank god I figured that out now in oppose to many more months later.. took me 2 months to figure that out. Since then, I’ve been out there once again and feel more optimistic. I still tend to sleep the days away.. barely cry.. might tear.. go out lil more often.. as you can see in my new pictures, went clubbing (Gay club, with the guys) had a great time. Small get togethers. Any opportunity I get to hang out with friends I go for it. Still feel I need that support. One problem I’m having with all of this is that afterward, I tend to feel guilty. Even if I haven’t done anything wrong. Which I never do. Even though me and my ex aren’t together anymore, I still feel connected in away I guess you can say. I can’t stand it. It drives me nuts.. can’t even talk to a guy without feeling that way. Talking to him just as a friend/making a new friend.. I just can’t.. a new good friend of mine, miss “Oletta” Angioletta linked me up to such a good song by Leona Lewis called, “Better in Time”.. This line sticks out more than any other in the song to me: “It’s time I let you go so I can be free, and live my life how it should be”. I really do need to let go. Despite not being together, I feel I still live for him.. still live to please him and I know he wouldn’t like it like that. Never has. My life should be mine and not anyone elses.. I should live for ME! But, it’s hard cause he’s the only guy I’ve ever been with.. and ever known. So, its hard letting everything go. He’ll always be in my heart but, for now.. I must learn to “detach the umbilicord” from mommy and learn to breathe on my own~
*Till Next time.. Take care guys!*
WingChick076*
